feelings subliminal

Dont be frightened to read the matter after seeing the title,it isnt poetry or anything.I just wanted to share the feelings which are deep burried in me.I dont know why but admist this hectic schedule of exams i felt that i needed some time for introspection.Life has changed a lot since i came to America.I dont wake up now with a friend’s lee raa…..leeee(get up!!! in telugu),we dont fight anymore at the breakfast table grabbing that one extra dosa(a kind of south indian pancake)from a friend’s plate,we no more go to those late night movies in the last minute, no more waiting for a friend’s birthday treat,no more panipuri and sugarcane juice on the roadside.I know all this may sound cliched,but true.I dont blame anyone for the change for change is natural,but only that i feel sometimes if life will ever get back to tht phase when everyday was so new and so fresh.Its not tht iam not having a good time here but only tht a feeling of nostalgia overwhelms me whenever i think of my Engineering life.That was the phase when i met my best friends, when i had crushes and someone else had a crush on me(u believe it!!!).All these thoughts have been coming to me from the last few days,the death of my best friend’s father and my very own grand mother only accentuated it.The feeling of the grief tht my friend would be going thru and the feeling of getting alone bothers me a lot.As the sem is going to end and summer is about to start iam feeling worried even more,cos i dont have any kinda internship or assistantship this summer im worried if i’ll die out of boredom.My initial plans of going to India also flopped.

I know this post makes no sense,infact i re-read the matter so many times,thought a hundred times to post this or save as a draft and finally posted it cos the very purpose of publishing this blog is to write all my thoughts in a place so that i can retrospect them someday and show them to my grandchildren(am i overdoing it?),i can find no better place than internet to which i can always have access.So i just wanted to publish these subliminal feelings tht came randomly to me.

PS:I wanted to ask a question to all my readers(being optimistic tht someone is reading this),If u get a chance to live one day of your life again which one would u choose?


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